115. Heal Your Money Wounds: Creating a New Paradigm of Wealth

Ready to transform how you think about money and societal norms? It's time to move away from the conventional views of success and create your own route to financial independence. 

In this episode of the Power, Purpose, & Prosperity Podcast, Sabine speaks with Emily Wilcox about financial freedom, balancing work and family, entrepreneurship, and personal growth. Emily is a 7-figure CEO, entrepreneur, money healer, and business coach. She helps women heal their money wounds, grow businesses, and build personal wealth while enjoying the journey.

Listen in to learn real-life experiences and practical insights that will empower you to take control of your financial destiny. You will also discover how to step into your greatness and create a new paradigm of conscious wealth.

Key Takeaways:

• The importance of taking accountability around your money wounds to heal them and create a better reality.
• The importance of pushing through mental barriers to overcome challenges women entrepreneurs face.
• The power of embracing anticipation and trusting the process of manifestation.
• How to get curious and do the shadow work needed to help uncover what’s holding you back.
• The opportunity for women to create a new paradigm of wealth where everyone benefits.

What You Will Learn in This Episode:

• [01:14] Emily reflects on her corporate career, her turning point, starting a side hustle and eventually leaving corporate America.
• [05:23] Understanding the money wound and how societal pressure tied to career achievements can impact personal fulfillment.
• [10:13] The different types of money wounds and how entrepreneurship can be a catalyst for inner growth and healing.  
• [15:40] The stigma around women discussing money, plus the power of empowerment and accountability.
• [22:51] Emily advocates for the power of community and mentorship in navigating the entrepreneurship journey.
• [27:16] Practices that shift Emily away from a scarcity mindset, plus the subconscious benefits of negative experiences.
• [34:49] How to shift from victimhood to empowerment and the potential for creating new paradigm wealth.
• [41:46] A quick blitz session with Emily: the lessons, legacy, and book recommendations.

Connect with Emily: 

• Take the Money Wound Quiz: https://emilywilcox.com/quiz
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/em.makes.money
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emilyjwilcox

Book Recommendations:

• The power of TED David Emerald Womeldorff  

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HOST INFO:

Sabine Gedeon is a transformative figure in leadership and personal development and serves as the CEO of Gedeon Enterprises. With nearly two decades of experience, she guides clients in startups and Fortune 500 companies. Sabine's unique approach combines human-centered principles with tech-enabled solutions, delivering customized programs for leaders at all levels to tackle crucial leadership and talent development challenges.

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ADDITIONAL SUPPORT:

Download Free Resources - https://sabinegedeon/gifts
Get Coaching Support: https://meetwithsabine.as.me/Discovery

Transcript

0:00

Are you tired of playing small and ready to step confidently into your greatness and share your unique brilliance with the world? Well, you're in the right place. I'm your host, Sabine Gideon, and I've dedicated nearly two decades empowering individuals and leaders as they confidently navigate the twists and turns of life and career transitions. If you're seeking direction, connection, or just a little push to play bigger, consider this podcast, your VIP path to a community that genuinely understands your journey. Join me every week for candid conversations and practical guidance designed to help you navigate the challenges of life and business, foster a growth mindset and cultivate meaningful connections. It's time to embrace your inherent power, define your unique purpose and prosper in every aspect of your life. Let's get started.

Sabine: 0:54

Hello and welcome. I'm your host Sabine Gideon, and we are here for another installment of the power of money series here today. We are talking with Emily Wilcox, and today is guaranteed to be another juicy conversation. So Emily is on a mission to bring more conscious wealth to this planet through helping entrepreneurs heal their money wounds and call in big align joyous. Moolah. Welcome to the show,

Emily: 1:26

Emily. Thank you so much, Sabine.

Sabine: 1:28

I am so happy to be

Emily: 1:30

here.

Sabine: 1:30

Same, same, same. So I've been, uh, we, we share a similar platform for speakers and I've been following you for quite some time and I just love the, I just love the realness. Of your message, right? There's no fluff. There's no, Hey, you can make it happen by just, you know, thinking about it. Um, but you give real hard truth to, you know, what's holding us back, um, as women entrepreneurs and also, you know, what to do about it in practical terms. But before we get into that, I would love for you to share with the audience, your career journey and what brought you to this place.

Emily: 2:09

Yeah, I mean, I was in corporate America and frankly thought I would never leave. Like I really appreciated the stability of that paycheck, especially because my husband was a little more entrepreneurial. And what I can say now that I never knew, then is I was very much in my wounded masculine energy, meaning that I had that hyper independence. I really felt like it was all on me to get it done, to make sure that we were financially safe. Like I really needed to have that control because that was, that was what was creating a false sense of safety in my life. And My world was completely rocked when I had my daughter and I went back to work when she was 11 weeks old. And, Really was not happy with that scenario. Now that situation never crossed my mind. I always thought I would be a working mom because I could never see myself just staying home. But all of a sudden I'm driving around Los Angeles, breast pump pumps attached to each boob, paying someone a thousand dollars a month to watch my kid. And I'm like, what am I doing here? This is, this is not it. This is not it. And so that was like the first seed that was planted for me about there being something else. And, you know, I could tell you the long version, but I want to make sure we've got lots of time to dive into money moons and all of that. So, so much for watching. Essentially, my husband and I started a side hustle. It was an e commerce business selling baby clothing on Amazon that started taking off, I started thinking, man, maybe before we have baby number two, we can build this thing big enough that I could leave corporate America. Fast forward three years. We've sold over a million dollars in baby onesies. That sounds amazing. And it was amazing. And the amount of money that flowed into our personal bank account was not enough to support a family in Southern California. And so we started an Amazon agency. To go alongside it where brands could hire us and we would use the same strategies that we're working so well in our business to help grow their sales on the Amazon channel. So three years, two babies, two businesses later. And finally I was able to leave corporate America and be a work from home mom and really change this dynamic where I could be so present for my babies and And also do really meaningful work.

Sabine: 4:45

Oh my gosh. I love that. There's so, so many levels. I want to start here first and foremost, you know, especially within the last few years, we've had a lot of women, uh, coming to those same realizations, right. Of like, this is not working. This is not reasonable. Um, and they've been making similar decisions, whether it's to step away from the workforce or maybe, you know, do work that is a little bit, um, less Demanding and less challenging. Um, and then really looking at, you know, how do I align what I do with more so who I am or something that brings me joy and it sounds like that's the, that's the place that you have gotten to and a place that a lot of women are going to, but I can only imagine, cause I was, you know, Similar to you, um, very much like, oh, I'm climbing up that ladder. I am going to be in the C suite. And so a lot of our identity, uh, is attached to the career. A lot of our identity becomes attached to our salaries and everything else. What were those initial, you know, and it sounds like you were also building something on the side, but what were some of those initial. I guess, uh, hold back thoughts, if you will, or limited beliefs that were really just kind of making you question, is this the right thing for me to do? Meaning stepping away from the path that is socialized as the path to a path that was not that it wasn't already in existence. It's just not as, uh, popular.

Emily: 6:18

I mean, I had so much inner healing to do because I'm in a neogram three, which is like the achiever. And so essentially what that means is I internalized as a kid, that the way to earn love and belonging was through achievement. And that works really well with the way that. The patriarchy is designed and corporate America is designed. And so, you know, I was very successful in school, very successful in my career, one rookie of the year, won all these sales awards, got promoted, got raises, was like a darling of, for my bosses. And all of that felt really good until it didn't. It was like, I understood the game and I was really good at playing it. And so for a while, it felt really good to play that game. And then it's like, you have this existential crisis where for the first time in your life, you realize. I actually never said, I really desire to play this game. This is what I really want to do with my life. And it was, it was really a shocking awareness for me because here I was like 30 years old, asking myself for the first time ever, what do I actually want me? Not anybody else, what they want for me. Cause I was really good at figuring that part out. But it was so much harder to actually figure out what I wanted. And it, and it invited me into so much inner work that is so, is very tied to my money story, because for me, even though I grew up very middle class and things were taken care of in that respect, money was the root of all conflict in my family. My parents fought about money all the time. It didn't feel like we had enough, even though we did have enough. And so what. What I learned as a coping mechanism is that it was actually better to suppress my desires to try to not give them any airtime or even entertain them because if I, if I could just get by without it, then I wouldn't have to inconvenience my family or burden them or potentially cause an argument between my parents over this very limited resource of money that would be needed in order to fulfill my desire.

Sabine: 8:36

Yeah. Oh my gosh. We can, I feel like we can spend hours here and then that ties back into, you know, the money wounds. I, you know, I've shared before when I, uh, my background, I'm, I'm an immigrant, right? So I've, I've had the opposite experience. So immigrants struggled hard work. Like that was the mindset. And because I was always willing to work hard and do all of the things, right. I always had money. I always had revenue. I always moved up until I like left corporate America and decided to start my own business. And I tell people that I felt like the minute that I made the decision to become an entrepreneur is the minute that everything that had been suppressed, everything that had been suppressed. Um, came to the surface and I had no idea how, how much, uh, how many wounds if you will, or how deep the wounds around money were, um, for me, it was just like, well, that was my, you know, that was my past. Right. But I grew up out of that. And like, now I'm doing better. That was the mindset that I had then. But then when it came to, now I have to figure out how to create money on my own. Just based on my own skills and based on, you know, what it is that I, who I am and what I give to the world. Oh, all the insecurities, all the lack, all the scarcity, all the poverty, like everything came flooding through. And the funny thing is, and I think I saw this on, on one of your lives on Instagram, it's like. Every new level you get to, there's another almost doorway that says, huh, before you can enter, right, deal with all of this. Right. And so people automatically assume that when they see someone quote, unquote, successful, that it was like this, like, nice Easy breezy of like, Hey, you are, but don't realize that actually no, at every level of what externally looks like success has been an internal battle, an internal, uh, period of healing, if you will, and an internal process of really just transforming and redefining who you are, what you believe yourself to be and what you believe. the impact that you have on the world to be. So I would love for you to talk a little bit more about just the process of identifying money wounds. And then, and I know depending on the money wound, it can go in different ways, but like, how do people begin to then start to heal once they've identified that they have one?

Emily: 11:07

Yeah, you are preaching to the choir. I always say that entrepreneurship is such a vehicle for inner growth and inner development, and one of the reasons that I'm so drawn to the money work is that money is a fantastic carrot to get us to do the inner work that we otherwise would not do facts. And I'm super grateful for that because the truth is if you just like dangled more joy in front of us, we might be like, I'm okay. I'm good. Like I'm pretty happy. But you start dangling like Big money. And we're like, okay, I will do the shadow work. I will look at where I think I'm unworthy. Like I will just go there. So I love that. And same thing, like all of my money wounds, I didn't think I had, like I was in corporate America. I was like my worth, my value was dictated by the market. It was like, well, you do this job and this is how much you make. And. And, and, and I was fine with that. And then all of a sudden you go out on your own and you're deciding your pricing and you're telling it to people and God forbid, they say, no, like I, that felt like the most personal rejection, like, Oh, you don't like me. I'm not good enough. I should just go crawl in a cave and die. Yep. Oh, dramatic. And then you're like, what's happening here? Like, this is the worst. I took a giant pay cut to now like worry about my business 24 hours a day and have the pressure of the world on me. But here we are still doing it because the truth is it's actually this really beautiful journey. So, and that's really my work with money wounds too, is like. It's not to stay in the shit, it's not to be like, we're just gonna figure out the wounds and sit there forever, it's like, look, if you have a mystery illness, and you're like, going through all of this suffering, the moment a doctor is like, oh, okay, I hear everything you've said, and here's what you have, is actually a really empowering moment, because all of a sudden, Now you can do something with that. You don't think you're broken. You're just like, Oh, I just have this thing. And there's a cure for this thing. Great. So with money wounds, and I have a quiz that you can go to it's free. It's money wounds quiz. com. And that'll help you diagnose your money wounds. There's six of them. And you'll probably have more than one again, does not mean you're broken. Just congratulations. You're human. You're having a human experience, but, um, you know, there's, there's the money shame wound, which is like. I'm not worthy of money. Oh, who am I, uh, to have big wealth. There's the money trust wound. Like, I just don't trust myself with money or with big levels of money. There's the evil money wound, just like having too much money is bad, or it's going to make me do bad things. Like, I'm going to have to go against my morals in order to, to build all of this wealth. Um, There's the hard money wound, which you've already mentioned. Oh, if I want to make more, I got to do more. Got to put it in some more effort. Got to hustle for it. There's the, um, the disappearing money wound, which is like, I don't trust money. I'm afraid it's going to abandon me. And then there's the safe money wound, which is like, I am not going to feel safe until I've reached this financial goal. I have this certain amount of money in the bank.

Sabine: 14:51

Yeah, thank you for breaking that down because I was going to ask you what are what are signs that people have money wounds and and I think that that's the that's the biggest challenge right that people don't recognize that they have money wounds similar to you. You were like, hey, I grew up middle class like we had what we needed. But yet, there were some of these internal messages that You know, might have seemed subtle at the time, but you had internalized them to believe that, you know, that there was scarcity and there was lack. Um, and I think oftentimes we, I had a client one time where, you know, her, her money wound showed up in the sense of, she didn't, you know, when she got bills, like she didn't want to open the bills or when, like, you know, she was getting phone calls, like she didn't want to answer the phone calls and it had been in so Hey, like, hey, if it's, if it's a bill or if it's a creditor, we don't address those people. And so it was this pattern of behavior and it was just like, okay, well, how can we look at where your capacity is if you won't look at the budget? And it was so such a block for her. Um, and this wasn't, this was someone who was, you know, making a really, really decent amount of money. So it's not about the amount of money that you have, so to speak of right now in this moment, but it's, what are the patterns? What are the behaviors? What are the mindsets? What are the emotions? That you have, um, as I was putting, as I shared with the group, I've been sitting with this for a while. And part, there are many reasons why I've been sitting with it, partly because I had to go through a process, uh, to be able to, you know, have these conversations and, and, and lead this initiative. Um, but I found that, you know, there is this, this stigma and this, um, uh, avoidance, if you will, with women in particular. About talking about money and it's come to the point where I realized, especially now that I've intentionally put myself in circles where I am with, with men consistently, right. From a business perspective, right. They talk about money all the time. Like they get together to talk about money. All the time. Yet when I come together with my, you know, my female entrepreneurs, we don't talk about that. We're talking about everything else. But, and I just feel like we're in this time in the space where we've been, we've seen in these last few years, this opportunity for women to really be elevated to a level that we have never, I feel like we've never had a chance to before in society. And it's almost like with anything, right? Like you see the rush and then you see the momentum and then it starts to die down or it goes into this place of really blaming, right? Blaming the situation, blaming society, blaming and all that other stuff. And I just wanted to bring a different perspective. Like we can blame all day. We can blame all day, but the, our power, we, we essentially are giving up our power when we, you know, when we choose to go that route. So rather than. Fall into the pattern of blaming or this injustice or that injustice. What I've come to learn, right. Or what I believe is that we, as human beings, we are creating our existence. We are creating our experiences day in and day out from a place of empowerment. If you really want to talk about empowerment, it's having that mindset to say, okay, my situation or my current experience may not be the greatest right now, may not be what I want right now. Okay. But I created this. So if I created this, how can I create something else? And I just want to help like raise the consciousness of women in particular, of the power that they have and that nothing, we're not subjected to anything.

Emily: 18:47

I

Sabine: 18:47

don't even want

Emily: 18:48

to say anything after that. It's so good. I will get on my soapbox.

Sabine: 18:54

I will get off my soapbox.

Emily: 18:56

I love it. Well, and it's like asking ourselves, like, who benefits by, by women not talking about money? Because it's not us. We don't benefit from that. What happens for us is that we don't realize what's possible, we don't become financially literate, we hold a lot of shame and guilt about whatever our situation is, and we don't heal our money wounds. In fact, we often don't even know that we have them. Like, here's a fun test for all of the listeners who maybe think they don't have a money wound. Optional homework. Go talk about money to someone you don't normally talk to about it. Want to know what's going to happen? Your money wounds will come to the surface before you even have the conversation. As soon as you even think about who you would talk to, and you start to feel barfy, that's, that's your clue. And you'll, like, the stories will come up. Like, oh, but I make more than that person, and I don't want to tell them that because now I feel guilty about it. Evil money wound or they make more than me. So they're going to think that I'm not good enough. Money, shame wound, like it's gonna come out. But when, when we don't talk about it, when it's just taboo and we don't go there, then we just sit around unhealed. Because we've internalized all of this and we never let it come up for air so that we can actually poke holes in it and say, me too, and link arms with other women and learn how to do better. And as you said, learn how to create the reality that we want.

Sabine: 20:36

Yeah,

Emily: 20:37

yeah.

Sabine: 20:38

I, as with any process, I'm, I'm, obviously, you know, it's easy to talk about it when you're at, The on the other side, if you will, or moving towards the other side. And I recognize that some people who are listening are like, I do have money wounds and I recognize them and I don't know where to start. And here's, here's the truth, right? Like it didn't, I didn't come into the awareness day one. And then all of a sudden, like I didn't have crap, right? No, because I had created or made a whole bunch of decisions that I then had to move forward. So hear this more as encouragement that wherever you are right now, that you can shift it. And. For some people, this might be a very, very painful process, right? Because it might cause you to have to look at the people that you looked up to, um, in a different light, right? Like they're no longer your heroes. It may cause you to have to question, you know, some of the decisions that you've made and take responsibility and accountability in ways that You've never had to before. Um, but like all things, right? Like if we scrape our elbow, right, we have to give it time to heal. Like it's going to be a scab first, or it's going to be an open wound. Then it gets scabby. And then eventually we'll, you know, we'll just see a, a mark eventually. So the, the encouragement here, you know, for those of you who are listening is. As the series goes on, right? Like taking the information. I always say, eat the meat, spit out the bones, right? Taking the information, understand for yourself where you are today. Be honest. I think the other piece around getting to a place where we can even talk about money like this, because it's been so, um, so pressed into us that it's not okay, is that you get to a place where you can be totally honest and accountable to yourself. Right. Uh, do Emily's exercise and go, you know, tell yourself you're going to talk to somebody about money, but at the same time be responsible for the actions that you've taken or not taken in that space. Right. Where you are today, really, essentially, it's nobody's fault. But the good part is where you want to be, you have total control over that with the help and support of others. So, you know, while we were talking about the money wounds, like shifting gears here for the women who are in entrepreneurial space, right. Yeah. Who have gotten through the mental madness of, you know, debunking all of these myths that we have carried as truth. And now. They're in their businesses and they're thinking to themselves like, okay, I've gotten here. I know how to do this. I wanna get here. But again, I feel, I don't know about you, but I feel like the initial walls felt hard, right? Mm. To like break down. But it's like you get to a place and it is like, oh no. Like there are walls after walls after walls, after walls. Mm-Hmm. And you're like, where did you come? From so for those who are in entrepreneurship, who have seen some success or have been able to, you know, create their own economy, so to speak. And now they're looking to look, go to the next level, but they're, they're dealing with that same demon again, how do they push through?

Emily: 23:48

I really believe in the power of community. I, I love putting myself in spaces where I'm in masterminds with other women entrepreneurs. I love having coaches and mentors. I really believe it's important to plug into that because so much of it is just realizing that this is part of life and this is part of the setup. And. You don't have to do it alone. That's a very wounded masculine approach. And when we, when we allow ourselves to receive, receive support, receive encouragement, um, it can be really powerful. And then I think it's just like trusting that this is part of the game of life. Like the gap between where you are now and where you want to be. Is your whole life period. You are never going to get to a place where you're like, I have made it. I have checked every box. I have hit every goal. There is nothing more that I want. I'm done. It's not going to happen. That's just not the setup. Like we are meant to expand. We are meant to continue wanting to be at the leading edge of our manifestation, right. To, to explore new uncharted territory. And so. It's really important that we recontextualize for ourselves, that the gap between where we are and where we want to be doesn't feel like lack. Because if it feels like lack, and it feels like there's something wrong with us, because we're not there yet, Then our whole lives are going to feel like lack and not being there yet. And so one of the most powerful shifts for me, and it's not perfect. It's not all the time. Again, this is why I have to put the right people in my ears is, is shifting that to anticipation and really getting into the juiciness of believing that it's on its way and feeling really good and participating in the magic of like, knowing that something is coming, that it's good. Yeah. And that it's going to happen in. A wild and fantastical way that's so much better than the plan that I would have had. My plans in my mind are always very linear, but it's like universe wants to surprise and delight us and wants to stack things up in a way that we get to be. Just part of it. And we get to be surprised by it. And, and the more that we can like lean into that and know that that is part of this game of life and that it can be fun, that it's not rigged against us, that we don't have to struggle against it. It really allows us to enjoy the journey. And that's really what it's all about.

Sabine: 26:42

Yes. I love that. Um, a couple of things that you were, you were saying in terms of, uh, anticipation, right? I think, um, Oftentimes, and, and I've been here, right? When, When you're experienced something experiencing something right where the reality feels like it's lack right like where you maybe do you don't your pipelines not big enough or you don't have enough clients, right? Like the reality says, sometimes it really is hard to get into that place. Like, I am wealthy like I have all my affirmations here. Yeah, I can see right. Um, sometimes you're saying it, but it's hard to, to get into that place. One of the things, uh, one of the practices I've, um, added in is my gratitude list, right? So I'll go through these periods where, when I'm aware, when I become aware that I may be operating in that lack or scarcity mindset, I'll Okay. What am I grateful for? And so I'll set out where like a month, right? Every day for the month, like 10 things that I am grateful for. Um, and really truly, cause they're coming from me. Those are things that I'm grateful for. And I can begin to embody that gratitude, begin to embody that anticipation for what already exists. And also what's coming, um, as far as some of your practices, do you have anything that you do that like really puts you in that space or moves you away when you find yourself in, you know, possibly that, that darker space?

Emily: 28:10

Yeah. Well, and just to pile on to your gratitude list, your gratitude list is also an evidence list. It is your list of evidence of things that you've wanted that you now have. Right? And so it reminds our brain that there's no difference between those things and the things that I want that are still on the way. It's just a timing thing, but like, yeah, if you didn't have all those things on your gratitude list, you'd be chasing after those. And instead you have them. And so appreciating them and trusting that like you created that you manifested those things. So what leads you to believe that you're not going to manifest the next thing? Like you will, it's going to happen. So I I'm right there with you, like in the power of gratitude. Um, Let's see, other practices that I like. Okay, I'm gonna say one that I actually don't normally talk about super publicly because there is, um, there is some finesse in the way that this will land. But I think, I think we're ready for it, which is when we're experiencing something that we don't like, okay? So if we believe that we create our own reality, then that means that The evidence that we have in our lives, having is evidence of wanting. So if I have a negative balance in my bank account, for example, that is my evidence. That on some level, some part of me actually wants that. And that is a really hard thing to accept. Really hard. So it's actually better when we have this conversation when we're not in the trigger. Because if you're like crying about your bank account and your coach or a mentor tells you like, Oh, you actually want that. You're going to punch someone. Like. It's the worst thing to hear. Um, but when we're willing to explore and get curious and even ask ourselves a hypothetical, like, okay, if, if I don't just think Emily's completely crazy and off her rocker, and I'm willing to just get curious and say like, if that were true, what part of me deep down is getting a sick pleasure out of having a negative bank account? And we can do that with any aspect of life, but this is like the real deep shadow work that helps us to uncover what's really holding us back. Because we're actually geniuses, and we get a benefit out of everything that we do, even when we sabotage. When we sabotage, there's always a benefit to us. Yep. But it's like so uncomfortable to look at. So this is a very next level thing and you might want to hire someone or work with someone to like navigate through this or read a book or do something but, but when we allow ourselves to get curious and just remove the shame piece and say, Okay, if I believe that every human, including me, gets a benefit from everything that they're doing, then this piece that feels crappy and consciously I really want to change it, then What is the subconscious benefit that I'm getting and then just really see what pours out of you.

Sabine: 31:53

Yeah. Yeah. I'm so glad you brought that up. Um, I, I've had to do that, that work on my own. And I remember the first time I, I heard that I was just like, yeah, I'm pretty sure no parts of me who wants to experience this. And I remember, um, at the time it was a coach that, that asked Uh, the question of how is this experience serving you?

Emily: 32:19

Yeah.

Sabine: 32:19

What about this experience is serving you? And it. And maybe because my, my mindset and my attitude and my approach to the work that I do is around serving others, right? It's really serving up my gift to others in that context. It spoke to me in a way where I was just like, huh, I'm serving me. In a way, in a capacity. And I remember at the time, this was, this was like earlier in my entrepreneurship journey and a couple of things that, that came to mind in terms of it's serving me quote unquote, serving me, um, for me at the time, it was this, their, the core wound, if you will, the way that I call it around the, I'm not worthy. Right. And so my situation, my financial situation at the time was reinforcing this belief in this core wound. Of me not being worthy and not only that I wasn't worthy, but in this particular situation, not only, not only did that exist, but I was so reluctant to reach out to someone else to ask for help. Right. And it was just like, I could, I could unwind this so much more. Yeah, it was, it was the, it was this belief of I'm not worthy. And the worthiness was more so around, you know, my, my ability to be successful in this capacity, my ability to be a coach, my ability to have money, um, my ability to have other people help me. Um, it was so much of that wrapped into that and it was just like, okay, cool. So what I learned through that process of, of identifying, all right, this is, this is the belief that's there. This is what I believe I'm serving myself. What would it look like if I believed that I was worthy? Yeah. How would I start to serve me differently?

Emily: 34:18

If I

Sabine: 34:18

believed that I was worthy and it, uh, created the space for me to one, ask for help, right? Let other people in, let, uh, let them know this is where I was to open myself to receiving.

Emily: 34:33

Yeah.

Sabine: 34:33

Um, cause that was, I didn't even realize I shut that down, but open myself to receiving and then three, really look at what was I presenting to the world? What was I presenting to my gifts and what was the real value of that? Not what I thought I needed to, you know, survive, quote unquote, but like what, what is the value that I'm bringing and the change and what is the evidence. And so that was a, that was a process to go through, but you're right. Like it, it starts with. Real, real deep truth and honesty with yourself. And I know that not everyone is always going to be at that place where they can be there. But, you know, if, as you're listening, like, you know, both Emily and I are having these, or have had these experiences or, and are sharing that sometimes that that's where you have to go. Um, and until you're willing to look at the truth. about you and about yourself. It's hard to create any reality that reflects that truth or better yet, you're, you're creating the reality that reflect that truth. But if you want a different truth, it's going to require that you take a step back and look at that so that you can create that new truth.

Emily: 35:44

Yeah. And it moves us from victimhood to empowerment.

Sabine: 35:46

There it is.

Emily: 35:48

Which is actually so great. Like it, it will temporarily feel crappy because there is something nice about thinking someone external or something external is doing this to you. And then you're like, damn it, I'm doing it to myself. Oh, that's even worse. But it's like, no, it's better because if you're doing it to yourself, then you get to choose and you get to do something different and you are in the driver's seat. And we want to be in the driver's seat in our own lives.

Sabine: 36:19

Absolutely. Absolutely. You made me think about, uh, this book that I read recently, the power of Ted. Um, and it talks about the drama triangle. I won't go into the details, but It was one of those, actually one of my coaches, uh, recommended it to me. And it was just like, he said in the beginning, he was like, once you see it. You'll never be able to unsee it. And it was just like, I could literally go back to instances or situations in my life, big and small, where, you know, I chose to be a victim or I was looking at the situation as a victim. And then the opposite of the victim is the creator, right? So you can move outside of that and look at it from the perspective of. Hmm. This is what I'm experiencing. This is what I created. What do I want to create next? How do I move forward? It does become such, such an empowering place to be in, um, where again, you may still experience crappy things. It's it's. It's part of the human experience, right? We're not sitting here saying that, Oh my gosh, once you get your mindset together, like life is going to be grand, that is street, baby. No, no, no, no, no. We still, I still ride on the struggle bus every now and then. So I'll be honest about that. Um, but the point is now you have these tools. Now you have this understanding and you have this awareness that is, you know, quite frankly, not what we're being taught, right? Completely opposite. Of what we learn. But when you look at our society, we always look at the people who are, you know, who quote unquote have made it or who are super successful. And we put them in these categories and they're in this bucket and they seemingly seem like they're the small percentage, even that narrative around the 99 percent and the 1%. I mean, like who made that up, but anyways, we won't go there. Like it's, it makes it seem like only a small few have like this, the success or this whatever, but that's not really true. It's a smaller few who have tapped into something. Um, that's, that's deeper. That's not the mainstream. That's not what's being taught. That's not what's being received as truth by most.

Emily: 38:31

Yeah. And what we're doing through, through our own embodiment, through these conversations is I believe is we're creating new paradigm wealth, because even that whole 99%, 1 percent thing, when you look at who we were putting in the 1%, that's old paradigm wealth. And a lot of those people are not happy, you know, they cracked the code on money. I will give them that, but they haven't cracked the code on healthy relationships. True love, self worth, sourcing internal joy, happiness, safety, security. And so what we're doing with this new era of conscious wealth building is really aligning values so that money is flowing in, in alignment with joy, happiness, love, relationship, self care, safety. And it's always a little harder when you're a trailblazer because you bump up against. all of the fears and limiting beliefs of the old paradigm, right? That's why we're worried, like, am I going to get rich and be totally out of touch? Am I going to be rich and be one of those people? Because our examples are from the old paradigm. And we have to be willing to say like, no, I actually really trust me and I trust that I'm doing it in a new way. And, and it's we, it sounds so big. But it, but it truly is conversations like this. It's like one awakening at a time, one shift of thought at a time, one choice to move from victim to creator at a time. That really does change the whole planet.

Sabine: 40:23

Yeah. Oh my gosh. That was so powerful. Um, the only thing that I want to comment to that is I remember, uh, a while back I did this program, it was called breakthrough wealth, right? And it was talking about wealth from the perspective of like this more holistic, because again, we've been socialized to believe that wealth is only tied to money. And, and in that program, it was like, no, there's mental, emotional, physical, spiritual. Territorial, where you live, relational wealth, financial wealth, right? Wealth is this, like, such a grander, uh, concept and mindset and state of being than what we believe it to be. And so as you were talking about, like, yes, like, you're absolutely right. It is a new paradigm of wealth. It is a more holistic paradigm of wealth that we're moving into. Um, and I don't, I don't know why I just feel like women in particular. Our, our being awakened or have the opportunity to be awakened and to lead that charge and to really shift. And again, it doesn't take away anything from men. It doesn't take away anything from what they bring to the table as far as, as leadership and who they are. We need each other, right? But now it's a rising of saying, okay, we, we've seen how you've done it. And now we want to bring in. A little bit more. And so combining those two, I mean, the, the power of the human mind and just the human species is just, it's just ridiculous.

Emily: 41:51

Yes. Everyone benefits.

Sabine: 41:53

Yes.

Emily: 41:53

More money flowing through the hands of conscious women. Everyone benefits. Yes.

Sabine: 41:59

Yeah. What is that? You, you give a man a dollar and he'll spend it. You give a woman a dollar, she'll feed it, feed an entire community or an entire village or something like that. Um, yes. So I, I could obviously talk to you for hours on this and geek out, but before, uh, before we wrap up, let's do our blitz session actually. Um, so as you think about, This version of you, right? If you could go back to a younger version of Emily and give her some advice that you think, you know, would have been a game changer or that, you know, now that you know it, you like, you really want to tell her, um, what might that be?

Emily: 42:41

I would tell her to really learn how to tap into her feelings and feel them and that they're all okay. Every feeling gets to be okay and gets to be felt.

Sabine: 42:54

Yeah, we I can do a whole series just on feelings alone. I love that. Um, and as you think, you know, forward focus, I know, you know, part of your, your mission is to help people heal their money wounds. Um, but you know, let's, let's fast track 50, 60, 70, 80 years from now. Right. And you're looking back on your life. What do you want that narrative to be? I would

Emily: 43:20

just feel so delighted if I helped even 10, 000 women gain financial and time freedom. I love that.

Sabine: 43:29

Love that. And then, uh, as you can see, I'm a lover of books and I also believe that leaders are readers. As you think about, you know, your journey, Are there any books that have been pivotal for you in really helping you either expand your mindset or just dig deeper into something that was helpful for you?

Emily: 43:50

So many and the book I'm going to suggest connects to what we were talking about doing that shadow work and understanding where you're getting pleasure from painful situations and it's called Existential Kink. And I believe it's by Carolyn Elliott.

Sabine: 44:08

Okay. So we will add that, uh, to the show notes. And for those of you who are watching live, I will put that in the comments as well. Uh, so Emily, we've had an amazing conversation that I just know could go on and on and on for hours. Um, but for the audience, and we're going to let them go, uh, as they're, as they're looking to connect with you as the light bulbs are going off and they're recognizing, you know, uh, I have some money wounds. I could use some help. I can use some support right now. How can they get in touch with you? Yeah.

Emily: 44:42

So first of all, go to moneywoundsquiz. com. The quiz is just six questions and it's really potent and it'll help you diagnose and start healing your money wounds. And then come hang out with me online. I'm on Instagram and I'm on LinkedIn and on Facebook, Emily June Wilcox. All right. Thank you.

Sabine: 45:02

Awesome. Well, thank you so much for sharing that. We will include all of Emily's handles, as well as the link to her website and the assessment for you to be able to take. Um, of course, feel free to reach out to her, uh, directly via LinkedIn or Instagram. I know you do a lot of lives there on Instagram. Um, with that, Emily, thank you so much, uh, for this conversation. I don't know. It just activated me all over again. Uh, so thank you so much. Yes. Likewise, Sabine. Thank you so much for having me. Absolutely. Be sure to tune in next Friday for another conversation with another female powerhouse who is changing the game, changing the paradigm and changing the flow of cash towards, um, change in our society. So with that, have a great rest of the day. Take care.

45:55

Hope you enjoyed this week's episode. If you found today's conversation helpful or got a piece of insight that you plan to implement in your life, I'd love to hear from you. Connect with me on LinkedIn at Sabine Gideon and send me a message, or feel free to leave a review on either Apple or Spotify. I also invite you to share this episode with anyone in your network, another powerhouse, possibly. Who you think might benefit from today's conversation. Lastly, as always, any links, any resources, or any upcoming training is included in the show notes. So be sure to check that before you leave today. Until we chat again, have a blessed and powerful week.